My Husband And I

My husband and I are going through his second deployment at the moment. The first time he was deployed, we were "only engaged", and, I'll admit, it was an interesting time. That first deployment definitely had it's down times. He isn't the greatest at communicating and thinking of calling me whenever he can, which frustrated me. But that was literally the only thing that was wrong with the last deployment. He wasn't in a combat zone and I would sometimes go two weeks without hearing from him when I knew he could have talked to me on the weekends. It killed me and it broke my heart, but, of course, I spoke to him about it.
So the problems with the first deployment were that I was too needy for communication and attention (like I always am) and he would get defensive if I brought it up (or any serious subject, for that matter). It just didn't work well with the distance.
When he finally came home, I had already booked my flight to see him for a couple of weeks after that. We got married on that visit and everything was fabulous! The wedding was very "us" and the whole visit went so well. After that, something just clicked between us. He really took his vows even more seriously than I could have ever imagined. And he has gone above and beyond all of his husbandly duties. Not saying that there haven't been moments where I've wanted to just smack him upside the head, but overall? He's the greatest match for me and I only become more sure of that every day.
Flash forward to present day. I just got off of Skype with him before he had to go into work. And I always ask him to tell me something sweet before he has to hang up. Today, it was especially sweet. He has a fellow Marine who had been having marital problems before the deployment and apparently they have continued into the deployment as well. Zac's been acting as a marriage counselor, per say, for this Marine.
He prefaced with that. It gets better, I promise. In fact, here it comes now! In acting as "marriage counselor" for this guy, it has opened his eyes to how amazing and rare and unusual our marriage is. This deployment, we have had ZERO fights. ZERO. Even when I was moving and stressed out because I didn't have power of attorney and had to pester him constantly for paperwork (and he eventually finally got me a POA so he could stop stressing). Even when I budgeted both of our paychecks and put us both on an allowance and he constantly was going over said allowance. I would bring up those issues and instead of getting defensive like he would have before we married, he was completely mature and rational and we worked as a team. Like it should be done. Do I still get a little sad when I don't hear from him as often as I'd like? Of course. But I have different expectations now. A person never stops growing and changing and evolving.
That's why marriage is so tricky, you know. Not because it's all the same thing, day in and day out, making life boring and predictable. It's because people change. And their interests change. And some people just grow apart as they grow up (which is why most people who marry young don't end up working out. They just grow apart as they grow up). But some lucky people find that one special person at a young age. They get married. The continue to grow up. And as they grow up together, they grow closer together. That is my marriage. Ever since we started dating, we've just improved one another just by being together. I've helped him to mature and think things through more and be a little more cautious with certain things. He has taught me to be a little more spontaneous and to take a few risks in life because we're worth it.
This deployment, Zac has heard four guys talking about divorce. In my dear husband's mind, he can't see why they could possibly want a divorce. Because his (our) experience in marriage has been so phenomenal and so -dare I say?- perfect.

That, my dear readers, is a keeper. I can't wait until he's back in my arms again so we can cuddle and love on each other in person again. He's so romantic while he's away, and I'm hoping I can get him to be this way when he's home. I'm determined. More than halfway through the deployment, finally, which means there are fewer days to count down now than there are that have passed. (Redundant? Yes. Do I care? No.)

Anyway, I hope that my story of the night has brought a little bit of joy or hope to someone out there. Sweet dreams to whoever the hell ever reads this ;)

xoxo,
Gossip Girl

Just kidding, it's me. Roxy. Bye!